In the afternoon I had to run an errand. It was absolutely pouring rain and there was thunder. I rolled up my pant legs and took my umbrella. And I loved it. Every second. The air smelled so fresh. The sound of thunder is one of my favorite. Everything was clean. I walked as slow as I could so that I could enjoy every second of it.
After work we went to the Bombay House for the graduate closing social. I haven't had Indian food since I went to London. It is so so yummy. We had a good time. Though I really missed Jordan (Greg got stuck taking a final so they couldn't come) and I honestly felt so out of place. I was sitting with Kathi and her husband Doug, Brittany and her husband Mike, and Noelle and her finance Jared. I was by myself with an empty place next to me. I wished so badly that I had someone to be there with me.
In the evening I got my haircut (shorter for summer! Thanks Kiley!) and then started cleaning checks and moving out. I'm staying in same place for the spring but the other girls are all going abroad, getting married, etc. We had a lot of cleaning and moving to do for them to be ready for checks this morning. I was up til midnight and then I went to sleep so that I could get up at 4:00 this morning and drive Eva to the airport.
I had one breakdown last night while we were cleaning. Even though I am staying we took down the things that were personal to our apartment... the quote wall, pictures from freshman year, our names from the door. I was having a really hard time with it all and then Eva and Lyss came and gave me a sandwich hug. And I just lost it. I cried and cried. And not just a few tears, sobs and shakes. It was just very surreal for them to all be leaving. I also cried after I dropped Eva at the airport. Just for a minute. I was tired so I didn't have more than a minutes worth of tears.
I really am at a crossroads right now. Looking back and looking forward. Looking back I am filled with gratitude and love for the three years I spent at BYU living with my wonderful friends. They helped me to grow and learn to become the person who I am. They have been there for many late nights of girl talk, many laughs, many tears. We have seen the very hardest and the very happiest things together. I don't think I can really express how important those girls are to me and how much I love them. And how much I already miss them.
Looking forward though I will have 3 new roommates tomorrow for the spring. I have work and classes for the term. The summer is still a little bit up in the air but it will be full of family and love and learning. [and Lake Powell!] In the fall I will move to a new complex with new roommates. I'm doing it blind. I'm honestly scared and at the same time, excited. There is so much ahead of me and I can't wait to see where it all turns out. And in the mean time I'm so grateful for the chapter that I'm closing, for preparing me for the things that are to come. What a wonderful past and what an exciting future ahead.
With all that in mind I was so grateful for the rain yesterday because to me it felt that the storm wasn't just washing away all the dirt and leaving behind a clean, new day, it was washing away this past semester, this past year and leaving me behind a fresh, clean start. I'm so happy for April showers both in the weather and in my life.
[added later: in the afternoon I ran a bajillion errands and cleaned out my apartment to get ready and be organized and clean for spring. in the evening I went to Patrick's and we played Settlers of Zarahemla with Storm. My battery was dead when I left so Isaac and Patrick helped me jump it.]
I LOVE the rain!! LOVE IT!! I love what it symbolizes, I love that the heaves open up to let the rain down.
ReplyDeleteWhat a wonderful crossroads in your life too.. cherish the moments of it, look both ways, then turn and look the other directions too!
It's good to look back and ahead, good to treasure the old and ponder the new; And good to make new friends and keep the old.
Glad the battery thing turned out okay. I shared my very first dead battery story with your Mom this morning. It was one of my very first situations I was forced to realize I could take care of it on my own, after having brothers who did it all for me all my life.
I missed them, I was scared, but once I survived it bymyself 800 miles from family, I knew I would never be the same(and I wasn't, who knew one could have such an ah ha moment over a car battery)!
A wonderful post! {{{HUGS, HUGS, HUGS}}}
You are a muffin=)
ReplyDeleteAnd about the unknown roommates in the fall, remember that pretty much everyone is a chocolate chip cookie. You look around and you can get along with pretty much anyone. They're sweet and fun and for the most part, not very difficult. But, sometimes, there are oatmeal raisin cookies. They look like chocolate chip cookies from a distance, but when you take a bite out of them, you're surprised because they are definitely NOT a chocolate chip cookie like everyone else. Does that make sense? In other words, you are more than likely gonna get a bunch of normal girls, there are not as many weirdies as there are chocolate chip cookies =) Once you've figured out they are oatmeal raisin, it's not a big deal. You just needed to know. =)